Iiiiiiit's a miracle

Here's a way to make serious money from your Siamese cat.

Wait for winter.

Take one Siamese, either seal, chocolate or blue point. Make sure that he/she is sufficiently young that their body colour has not started to darken.

Take one set of clippers, with as small a head as possible.

Use Google to find a black and white picture of either Elvis or the Virgin Mary - you do want contrast and you don't want too much fine detail.

Grasp the Siamese firmly by the scruff of its neck. Pick up the clippers in the other hand and shave a picture of Elvis or the Virgin Mary onto your Siamese. Take care not to cut the little critter - this is not meant to be cat cruelty.*

Don't let anyone see your shaved kitty.

Exposed to the cold, the shaved kitty skin will grow dark fur in your Siamese's point colour in the shape of Elvis or the Virgin Mary.

It's a miracle!

Now place a photo of the miraculous reincarnation of Elvis or the Virgin Mary on your Siamese on Ebay. Start the bidding low and wait for credulous idiots and Las Vegas casinos to solve all your financial problems.

Indeed, a miracle.

*No cats were harmed in creating this unique money making opportunity. If only I'd damn well thought of it while they were still pale...

Dear client - just in case you were wondering why your deadline got missed